Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Dear John...

Hey! So i think i truly am getting over John. I noticed a difference in how i felt around him even from yesterday. My goal is to be over him by the end of the week. Hence the song...



But if anyone is wondering more about where my obsessing over John came from, here it is: Shortly after I realized i was GAY and not bi and came out to my friends we all hung out one night are were putting on henna and just chillin. After my friends parents left we decided to play truth or dare and things were going pretty normal. Then they decided to test if i really was gay, so every time it was Johns or my turn they would have us do stuff with each other; although it never got to be more then making out and lap dances. =/ I had had a crush on John Since school started, but after that night my mind basically out of control and I had fallen for him... stupid, right?!?! Then things got worse after that as i dwelled on it more and more... but i think thats ended, thank god!
I think i had such an over-the-top reaction to my liking him because he was the first guy i had a full gay crush on and the 1st guy i ever kissed. I think I may have even LOVED him. And this all happened a day or two after i came out to them too... and he's SUPER cute! So yeah, thats the stupidity behind it all...

Oh, and Jaykodot had to shut down because of some legal problems. =( Thats now 2 of my favorite blogs gone this week! Sorry to see you guys go, hope everything works out for you!

2 comments:

  1. It's a bitch when that happens isn't it? Did the same thing with my best friend at your age, totally f***cked the friendship. Oh well...

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  2. It is a real tough one emotionally speaking. Fourtinantly we are still friends and hang out sometimes. I dont know if he ever found out if i had anything more then a little crush on him, so that was probabally good.

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