Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Life suckes sometimes...

Hey guys! so here's whats up:

-My dog died Saturday night and it hit us all pretty hard, but my dad who was a history of alcoholism problems started drinking again. Because of this, my mom left to go stay in a hotel last night and said she won't come back until he stops. Last night i left him a very emotional note pleading with him to stop and made my case to him... He hasn't stopped. So my mom won't be coming home tonight and I don't know what to do with him. any ideas?

-I am scared to death about finals and I cant find much time to study. I really want to keep a good GPA for my last year in high school, but idk if its gonna happen...

-This guy who I really, really like, John, is supposed to get me something for our Secret Santa thing that I'm doing with my group of friends. We were supposed to exchange gifts today but he didn't bring mine. In fact he seemed to kinda ignore me all together today. I mean, I know he doesn't like me like I like him, but it really sucked. And i have been apprehensive about what he will end up getting me. So yeah love hurts but i would really like a boyfriend right about now...

How are you guys?


  1. Hallo Anton,

    Of course I'll link to you! I'll even put up a special post to get you some hits and hopefully some new friends.

    Been reading about your recent troubles at home and I sure will say a prayer for you (not a religious one, more of a cosmic prayer).

    If I can help in any way just mail me at the addy on the "A Rent-Boy Named..." homepage.

    Don't give up, better days are ahead!

    Cheers Tristan

  2. Thanks for all your help and support! Things look like they might be getting better already.
    I got your link up too. I really appreciate what you’re doing for me, thanks again. ~Anton

  3. You can no more be responsible for your parents behavior than you can be held responsible for the weather. I know this is a big distraction for you at a critical time, finals. Try to focus on your studies finals only last a week and then you can devote more energies towards your family.
    John probably doesnt even realize how his behaviour is affecting you. I know you really want a boyfriend but what you really need is someone to listen to you with some empathy.

  4. Anton,
    This may sound hard right now, but you need to let go [ lovingly, ] but let go and take care of yourself and your schoolwork/ I fully understand about alcoholism/ I can't talk about anyone but myself when it comes to Alcoholism/ I was out there for 20 years and I was Drunk or Drinking for 19 of them years/ I'll keep this short, my father died when I was 19, and left me with 2 brothers, 2 sisters, mother, the cars the trucks 7 houses under construction and 90 thousand in debt/ I was the oldest son/ This ain't no BS/
    Now this is the hard part, [ for you ] as long as I was drinking, nobody could help me/ and as long as your dad is under the Drink no one can help him/ You can be there for him, but you really need to take care of yourself, so you can be there for him/
    Losing a Pet ain't easy for most people, I've cried over more then 1, myself/
    I'm going to stop this right here for now/ I will ask Tristan to give you my Email/ IF you want it/

    I'm sunny over on A Rent Boy/ there's an Off topic page where you can talk to me further if you want too/ OR we can talk right here if that's better for you/

    caring.... sunny

  5. Sunny, thanks so much for sharing your experiences and giving me your advise. I have dealt with this before and i usually just end up ignoring the situation until it passes, but i dont move on well. I will try it this time and focus on getting good things going on in my life.
    I have done a good job keeping a clear head and looking at the positive things going on around me, and i will try to keep it up. Right now i am fairly emotionally stable and i think i can pull through this.
    Thanks again for helping me out here ~A

  6. understood/ I know I talk a lot and Some Time to fast, but I'm also a good listener/ So this old man will just stop by now and then just incase you have a question for an old drinker who hasn't had a drink of Alcohol in 34 years/ From what you told us so far, causes me to think you are a pretty strong young man and you are RIGHT about love/ it can hurt, it hurts because we care/
    I have spent a lot of years talking to young people; and I always tell them one thing/ [ I can't tell you how to live your life, but I can tell you how not too/

    I wish you all that's good in life/ Don't stop looking for that right someone/ [ This is just a funny saying ] God never closes a door unless he opens another one, but it's hell waiting in the hallway/

    caring.... sunny

  7. If it makes you feel any better I didn't get my secret santa stuff either from my person. Except he said he'd give it in january, like everyone else apparantly hahaha

  8. Sunny, thank you so much and i can see myself wanting to talk to you more in the future. I appreciate everything!

    And Ariel, ive set luis and aurora on a quest to make sure he keeps his word, or i will just go with Brit's idea and just have Nate get me one =P

  9. Similar problem but different perspective. My 31yo son has been an alcoholic more than half his life (since he was 15) and now he has diabetes. And a 10yo son who is smart, cool and knows what is going to happen. His dad throws up blood, his legs often have no feeling (poor circulation from diabetes) and his kidneys hurt bad. It's like talking to a walking dead man.

    But he is loving, smart, trustworthy and honest. He loves his son but won't stop drinking. I give him less than a year.

    His son (my grandson) and I talk a lot and he understands and accepts- as much as a 10yo can- what will happen. He also knows how much his aunts, cousins and grandparents love him and with that he feels secure.

    We have all begged, cried, threatened, pleaded, bargained, and tried everything we could. I now have to accept it. My grandson is also starting to accept it. Sadly, there is only one person who can make the change. Sunny did, and I can only hope the same for my son and for your father.

    I hope you can find the strength to do what is best for you, which definitely includes your schoolwork and, of course, love. Acceptance is even harder than forgiveness but both are necessary to get on with your life.

    It's so tough, sorry if this went on too long but it's sad that alcohol can make otherwise good and caring people so selfish, unaware of the pain they cause to those they love. If I prayed I would certainly say one for you.

  10. Tom, thank you for sharing your story. its helpful just knowing other people are dealing with the same shit, and im not alone in how i feel. I am sorry for your situation, it sounds like a rough one. Hope things get better for you!